“But if you’re no longer in love with writing, for whatever reasons, then there are only three choices. The first is to abandon writing and look for a new love. The second is to continue with your dull marriage, writing but not loving. The third is to fall in love again.” ~ Eric Maisel, Living the Writer’s Life
The relationship between a writer and writing is a type of marriage, and one thing I have learned from a long marriage union to my husband is that on any given day we arrive at one of the three places named above. In any relationship, we have times of not loving, times of dullness when we carry on but wish we did not, and then times when we fall blessedly back in love again. The think to know is that each of these places of our heart is a choice.
Love is a choice. Not loving is a choice.
I went through each of the three places in my heart many times with writing. Not understanding myself or the nature of love and attitude, I slogged through years of a dull writing life, with one foot out the door, thinking that I had to do something different. When that door opened wide enough, out I went. I transferred my writing affections to caring for a new home and a small boy. It was right to do at the time.
Now I arrive where the choice is to be made again. Am I to write? I dabbled for sometime. And then I made the choice to fall in love with writing, head over heels, all over again.
This is no immature love. I’m in love this time with eyes wide open. Every weekday, I meet my love of writing and work on my project, and in between that, I read and pay attention to words. I play with words and express the pictures I see in my mind, shaving here, refining there, trying to express what I see and feel and know. This love has nothing whatsoever to do with publishing but all to do with my relationship with writing. I know now that being in love with writing means I give it my commitment. I pledge my heart to the writing.
Commitment to our unique way of life, then is our task today and every day. It is not to be undertaken for our self-improvement, nor for salvation of the world or society, but simply because we can do no other if we are to be true to the individual hypothesis of our lives. ~ Helen M. Luke, Women, Earth, and Spirit