I find C. S. Lewis’ wisdom immensely encouraging. If a spiritual giant such as Lewis had to begin again each day at the beginning with his faith, it seems reasonable for me to have to not only begin all over each day with relying on God, but sometimes several times a day I begin again. As a human on earth I will not ever ‘arrive’ at perfect faith.
The relying is a daily and moment by moment thing.
Each morning I arise and purpose to turn my life and will over to God, give it a good go, but like as not, ten minutes out of the prayer chair I’m worrying about one thing or another, get irritated with something, and strive in my own pitiful strength to hold up my world, as well as that of everyone else. Good thing I get to start over tomorrow, and after a good night’s sleep. Good thing I really can begin my day over any time I need to do so.
In Lamentations 3:23, we are told: “Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning.”
With all the small and large trials crowding in–the fear that I won’t have the ‘right’ words for rewriting Chapter Two, that I lack the organizational ability to manage my writer-self-widow-life, that dog hair will overrun me if I don’t get the floors vacuumed, the health concerns and heartaches for family and friends–let me remember and rely on God’s fresh mercies coming to me each morning. His mercy gives me all the wisdom and perfect ability that I need for living my life. I can rely on it.
The relying has to be done afresh each day, and it is designed that way to bless us. I think of it and smile.
Grace and peace,
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Curtiss Ann Matlock 