Shadow light of morning. Twilight, my favorite light. The pole lamp has gone out. Can see the pasture and all the way to the line of trees across it. There’s a hint of a mist on it. Cooler, but the 70* is a warm and humid one–still barefootin’–and not a leaf stirring high or low this morning. An abundance of birds enjoying flying through the trees in the clear air. Some just twitting, chirping, and one who actually sang before moving on. Every now and then I hear a pecan fall on the metal roof. I doubt we’ll have a harvest this year, though.
A new day. I have a number of hopes for today. Likely, just by odds, some of them will come true. It’s good to remember that. I have fears, too. One is my mother, who is getting weaker and been having these ‘spells’. I fear inabilities–can I deal with whatever I need to deal with for her? Can I make right choices for her?
But with the fears, we can fall back on the hope to weather the fearful happenings, and odds are that we will. I am reminded of something the writer Faith Baldwin wrote: “Why worry about how will you manage to get through it? You always have, haven’t you?”
We do get through. I have discovered that I am stronger than I knew, that all of us are. And that each day has so many blessings, just wonderful things that happen to me out of the blue. Yesterday I got phone calls from both a precious Oklahoma friend and my dear sister-in-law Carolyn Matlock-Hessling. And of course I enjoyed some fine tea grown on high mountains all the way around the world from me. Pretty cool, this life on earth at this time.
Guess I’m chatty this morning. I can’t wait to hear about your plans and day!
Curtiss Ann Matlock 
5 responses to “I Always Have Gotten Through”
Your own wisdom as a caring daughter and the guidance of God will lead you to the right answers for BOTH of you. Neither of you is in this alone. Hugs and many blessings to both of you.
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I’m reading this at the end of a long day. It is getting dark but one blessing of an IPad is that is reading in the dark, like having a book with its own flashlight. The wild turkeys are clustered in the trees, and the tree frogs are louder than the evening traffic on our road.
The thing I have always most loved about your books is how your characters, in all their human imperfection and glory, struggle through confusion, loss, and fear. I work for a small college whose motto is “To light, through love.” That is how your characters get through hard times and make hard choices, through love. That is your innate wisdom coming out there, though all those folks in Valentine and elsewhere. You will get where you need to go.
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What a beautiful gift you give me with your insights, encouragement, and a view of your world. Thank you so very much. There is nothing more valuable to give than beauty and encouragement.
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Love hearing the birds in the morning and any other time. Cool morning, 65degrees. Think I will try to hang a load of clothes on the clothesline today. You will only make the right choices for your mom, you are her daughter. ❤
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Thank you, dear Ruth. I will take up confidence in my decisions. ❤
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